Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.