Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?