Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
