why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
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