and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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