It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the liver wants what the liver wants
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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