I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
