Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
i think im in europe. pls send help
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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