you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I just googled if crying burns calories
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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