is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
You can't motorboat a personality
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
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