Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
