We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Randomize