Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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