I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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