2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
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