Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I just googled if crying burns calories
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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