Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize