whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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