it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize