im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Randomize