have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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