Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
