Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
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