I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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