i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
