found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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