Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
