I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
My feet surprised me
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize