how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
My balls are so social today.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
