chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow