I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
