You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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