I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
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