is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
The power of my boobs compel you
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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