I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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