I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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