just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
