Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
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I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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