Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize