so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
