Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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