Define "chronic" masturbator.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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