I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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