using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize