i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize