i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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