Already got asked if we're dating
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize