i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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