so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
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