I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
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