Where are you?
In a non slutty way
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
