Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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